How to lose a friend in ten days.

It has come to my attention that many of you are burdened by the problem of friends. You would like to be antisocial, but already have friends and do not know what to do about that. So I decided to help you with your problem. I have compiled a list of tried and true methods to get rid of your friends, so that you can be who you really want to be.

Now at first I considered things we see everyday, like flirt with their significant others. But I have seen that all the time and despite logic it does not seem to work. So I came up with some creative ideas.

1. Start an exotic bug collection. Bring it up at all possible occasions. Don't stop talking about it.

2. Eat beans for every meal. (with this one... its more the side effects that matter not the act of eating beans)

3. Wear the EXACT same thing to school as your friend as much as possible. (If you are a girl, I can't see your friendship lasting longer than a couple weeks)

4. Facebook chat them every single time they are on facebook.

5. When a friend is talking to you, do not look them in the eye except when you are correcting their grammar. Which you should do frequently.

6. Only answer their texts every three times and with a one word answer with a period. "cool." "k." This way they know you are getting their texts but that you just do not care.

7. Laugh REALLY REALLY loud at anything and everything or even nothing.

8. Whenever their pencils are not straight on their desk, take the liberty to fix it for them.

9. Make sure your cat/dog/bunny or other furry animal lays on all your black clothes before you wear them.

10. Don't forget to talk about your exotic bug collection.

Well I hope this helps solve your problem! Let me know if you have any other ingenious methods of losing friends!